By the way, the “breakup rule” isn’t actually a thing because this is how long it actually takes to get over someone. I’m with you. Check out the entire Gen Why series and other videos on Facebook and the Bustle app across Apple TV, Roku, and Amazon Fire TV. Alas, perhaps a break is just a benchwarmer to the full monty, the actual breakup. "Even if you both agree [about sleeping with other people], opening up the relationship increases the risk that one of you will end up finding someone you'd rather be with," explains Weisman. And please, for everyone’s sake, cut someone loose if you don’t want to be with them. With that absence, you get to ask yourself certain soul-searching questions, like “Do I miss him? My boyfriend and I love each other, but we have been fighting a lot lately and he wants to “take a break.” I don’t understand how this works. (Yes, I was usually the party to be ignored.) In healthy relationships we tend to trigger each other but the best way to grow is to face the issues together head on, ideally with a therapist. You two don’t really have to communicate 12 hours a day to keep the relationship going. First of all, whether or not being on a break means you’re free to see other people depends on your understood partnership contract. There isn’t a right or wrong choice, but if, for example, you anticipate that receiving regular texts from your partner may lead you to feel some level of anxiety, it might be best to err on the side of less contact. "[A break] can help you regain your perspective and get a chance to see what life feels like without the other person," explains Weisman. If we do this, what does it look like? The beginning of the new year comes with the irresistible urge to start over fresh, which means it's a great time to get a haircut. © Copyright 2020 Meredith Corporation. And how long should a break last? The final joint decision to make, before you part ways, is to set a clear timeline: True breaks, says Winter, last for the duration of a pre-set amount of time that’s agreed upon in advance. If there is an end date, once it arrives, you have a LOT of talking to do to discuss what you felt and learned during your time apart. © 2020 Well+Good LLC. Should I even agree to this? No matter how much you love someone, you may, at some point, get the urge to, um, clock out of your relationship for a period of time. How long is this break going to last? While I don't have a relationship with a person that I can compare this to, I can certainly compare it to my relationship with the city I live in, New York. Each product we feature has been independently selected and reviewed by our editorial team. Does Taking a Break in a Relationship Ever Work Out? Make no mistake: Breakups can be a nightmare, but so is not giving yourself a real chance to move on. So what if the seasons change, you reconvene, and you still have doubts about the relationship?
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